The Hangover Cure (or I Swear, I Will Never Drink That Much Ever Again … No, Really)

Hangovers

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Hangovers are an inevitable consequence of many a young traveler’s foray into the seedier and more exciting places around the world. Everyone has their own opinion of which hangover cure works best for them. For me, the remedy is simple and, in all the hazy years I’ve spent punishing my liver, this recipe has never failed me.

The night of your alcohol-fueled endeavors:

  • Never drink on an empty stomach. But you knew that, right? Seriously, if you’re dining out, don’t order your booze until after you’ve gotten at least some appetizer in your belly. Heavier food is best as it slows the digestion process, and thus the rate of absorption of alcohol into your bloodstream.
  • Drink a liter of water before you go to bed. Half a liter’s good. A full liter is best. You’ll have to force yourself to drink this much water in one sitting and, yes, you’re bladder will feel like an overstuffed holiday pig around 5:00 a.m. But every ounce of fluid before bed is worth ten the morning after.
  • Drink a bit of Gatorade/Powerade before bed.
  • Use the loo before you crash. It may save you the afore-mentioned 5:00 a.m. wake-up call from your bladder.

And the morning after:

  • Keep a bottle of Gatorade/Powerade onhand. And everytime you think to yourself “Lord Jesus, if you can make the room stop spinning for just five minutes, I promise I will never drink that much again. No, really, I’m serious this time.” … that’s your cue to take another swig.
  • Optional: pop a couple of your favorite headache pills. If you’ve followed the previous advice however, this step will likely be unnecessary. Unless you popped the seal and finished the worm on the same bottle of tequila by yourself. In which case, why are you reading this? Find a stomach pump. No, really. You may be dying.

That’s all there is to it. Simple, right? For many, these “tips” are obvious. Yet I’m amazed at how many of my friends don’t follow the basic, common sense tenets of alcohol consumption. Don’t let it happen to you!

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