Lost City Of 25,000 Man-Hungry Swedish Lesbians Grinds China’s Internet To A Halt

© Kadir Celik

If the interwebs awarded a trophy for Headline Of The Day, today obviously wouldn’t be close. But this is for real.

China is on fire with a rumor that Sweden is hiding a town of 25,000 sex-hungry erstwhile lesbians, where the gates are guarded by Amazons who savagely beat intruders and where residents are let out only occasionally to dabble with men. The tales of the vanished ‘Chako Paul City’ have brought the country’s Internet to its knees as men bombard search engines and forums looking for information.

If Sweden really is keeping this from the world, by the way, that’d be pretty selfish:

[The town] was said to have been founded by a wealthy, man-hating widow in 1820. A pair of blonde female sentries are said to stand guard at the town and men wishing to enter risk being “beaten half to death” by police… According to a leading Chinese news agency, the man-starved residents are allowed to leave the Swedish city limits for trysts with male lovers.

The Swedish rep from the writeup issued a denial and complained that “it’s hard to believe that you could keep something like that a secret for more than 180 years.” Yeah, because that’s the problem with this theory. Not that there’s a Lost City where 25,000 sex-deprived Swedish vamps are locked up waiting for Chinese tourists to come rescue them, Rapunzel like, and whisk them from their Edenic dystopia. It’s that someone would have noticed by now. Why not just roll with “oh come on folks, you’d see it on Google Earth wouldn’t you?”

Serious exit question: what the hell is going on sociologically and demographically inside China where tens of millions men are pinning their hopes for sexual release on this nonsense? Has their gender imbalance really gotten that bad? (Hint: could be.)