Man Cries Wolf … er … Wombat After “Rape”

To be clear, this is not the alleged wombat rapist © Stygiangloom

A New Zealand man who called local police to report that he had been raped by a wombat has been ordered to do 75 hours of community work for wasting police time.

Arthur Ross Craddock, a 48-year-old orchard worker from the South Island Town of Motueka, called emergency services when he was unable to get through to his local police station. Frustrated at being told he couldn’t speak to Motueka police unless it was an emergency, he made up an emergency of his own – he was being raped by a wombat. He called back in a few minutes to say he was dropping the charges – because the wombat apparently had “pulled out.” No major damage, he said, except that he was now “speaking Australian.”

The judge was unimpressed, and Craddock has been sentenced to 75 hours of community service. Not that it’s all bad for Craddock after his terrifying ordeal. He’s been interviewed by the Graham Norton Show for an upcoming series.